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  • Writer's pictureJulie Weston

Who am I?

What strange times we find ourselves in. All over the globe people are dying, here in our magic Aussie bubble, we are at varying stages of isolation, lockdown, or freedom. Fortunately, compared to the rest of the wide world, we’ve had very little by way of numbers of deaths.

My ‘work’ hours were cut by 30%, lucky to have a job at all! I’m so very grateful. And so, with more time on my hands and little by way of weddings, or indeed just about any ceremonies going on, I’ve taken some time out and have been reflecting on the meaning of life. Thoughts ranging from how to live life to the fullest - to what does it mean for someone to die a 'good death' have been whirling around in my mind. I found myself drawn to a group of kindred spirits, all delving into the same stuff at the same time. A mix of Celebrants, Funeral Directors, End of Life Coaches, Artists, and others with a deep thirst for knowledge of Self and inward journeying have come together to muse on these things.

The theme of our reflections has been ‘Celebrating this precious life’ based on the book by Steven Levine, ‘12 Months to Live’. It’s an exploration of how you might feel if you were told you only had a limited time to live. In our study group, we’ve been given only 6 months….and we are getting to the pointy end of it. It has been a wonderful journey and we still have a couple of months to go.

We’ve been explored topics like:

- What are the things I want to do before I exit the planet?

- Life review/reflection – so just what have I been doing for all these years since I was born?

- What kind of ceremony (if any) would I like? Music, readings, or not?

- Am I more of a cremation kind of person, perhaps a green burial is my thing, anyone for compost? Or maybe a scattering of ashes in the Himalayas.

- We’ve had deep and meaningful discussions on all of this, learned how to practice deep listening, relaxed into beautiful guided meditations, and done forgiveness practices (for self and others).

Really this is just the tip…. It has been a wonderful journey and I’m so grateful to have the opportunity to explore these things with a group of fellow life travellers. If anything, I feel like I’m living my life to the fullest, as my best self, authentically, on my terms, with my boundaries exactly where I need them to be.

The thing is, as a Celebrant who offers ceremony on the whole cycle of life, I can’t go about celebrating someone else’s life if I haven’t contemplated my own precious life (and eventual demise). I can’t walk the path of sadness, of sorry business with a family when I haven’t experienced grief and loss on my own journey.

This week posed the question – Who am I? Below is my reflection on that….

Who am I?

I am a wisp of air of thoughts

I am my ancestors all who came before me

I am my mother and yes, my father

I am my children

I am my husband,

my friends, my lovers, my sisters, my brother

I am my memories

I am the exchange of air as it flows through my body

I am my dreams my yearnings

I am a part of all there is and all there is to be I am love and desires I am the cells and blood and bone that make this body

I am my heart and lungs and everything from the top of my head to the tips of my toes

I am the remains that will be left when I die

I am laughter and tears hunger and satisfaction

I am a child, a mother a wife, friend, and lover

I am a name whispered, shouted, written

I am sadness and happiness

I am secrets and learnings

I am all that ever was and will be

I am stars and moondust and sunbeams

I am rivers and mountains and beaches

I am nothing

I am everything

Julie Weston

If you are interested in exploring ‘This precious life’, go to Wendy Haynes is a Celebrant, Teacher, Meditation Guide, and an all-round incredible, authentic, fabulous, and compassionate human being.

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